no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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