Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(910): View more from North Carolina

He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.

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(910): He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts. http://tfl.nu/0rlv

Replies (22) Good night (3305) Bad night (1660)
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(702): View more from Nevada

you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.

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(702): you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly. http://tfl.nu/rajr

Replies (11) Good night (4190) Bad night (980)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard

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(203): whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard http://tfl.nu/amtb

Replies (28) Good night (865) Bad night (4025)
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(914): View more from New York

getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.

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(914): getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight. http://tfl.nu/b9qd

Replies (60) Good night (920) Bad night (6223)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.

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(307): I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen. http://tfl.nu/qqp8

Replies (8) Good night (3858) Bad night (1618)
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(909): View more from California

My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.

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(909): My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up. http://tfl.nu/4jl3

Replies (5) Good night (2612) Bad night (1538)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?

(408): View more from California

JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.

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(902): Is this a genuine concern or are you just high? (408): JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN. http://tfl.nu/lbkb

Replies (5) Good night (3976) Bad night (915)
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(713): View more from Texas

He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk

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(713): He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk http://tfl.nu/6kdn

Replies (7) Good night (1597) Bad night (715)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.

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(404): I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers. http://tfl.nu/2ka7

Replies (1) Good night (1497) Bad night (599)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.

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(832): Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs. http://tfl.nu/d8k3

Replies (0) Good night (1038) Bad night (446)
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(631): View more from New York

Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card

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(631): Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card http://tfl.nu/dp25

Replies (15) Good night (901) Bad night (518)
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(530): View more from California

so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.

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(530): so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong. http://tfl.nu/gz7f

Replies (4) Good night (815) Bad night (398)
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(626): View more from California

I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet

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(626): I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet http://tfl.nu/8x4b

Replies (0) Good night (651) Bad night (401)
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(320): View more from Minnesota

An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.

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(320): An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made. http://tfl.nu/7315

Replies (6) Good night (697) Bad night (515)
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(905): View more from Ontario

4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours

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(905): 4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours http://tfl.nu/zrgf

Replies (5) Good night (415) Bad night (531)

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