Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Randomize
