yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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