I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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