How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
