they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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