I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Randomize
