And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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