so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize