I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
