my sisters under your porch take her home
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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