Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
