I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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