I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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