is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
