He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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