Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
