You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
