Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
