You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love