did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos