My first STD was from a foam party
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize