Clothes are such an inconvenience.
His hands were made for my vagina.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
