It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
