I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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