i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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