Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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