i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize