i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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