I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize