just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
