so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize