Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
