I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
We don't watch enough power rangers
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize