when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
