I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
