You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize