I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
