Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
BRING THE BAGELS
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize