They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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