Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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