i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
