I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.