beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.