I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Randomize
