Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
