Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
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Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
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I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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