Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
