I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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