Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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