2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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