I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
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All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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