i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
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