I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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