We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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